I haven’t been on for a while, moving to University is hectic. From nights out, to actual reading I’m having a blast 😛
Seen as its word mental health day I wanted to at least right something that may help another person as mental health is really important to me. Its what helps us communicate, socialise, love and if there is anyone with a mental illness, I hope you know how strong you are.
At the age of 17 a horrible event happened in my life and anxiety has never left my side since. Its a part of me that’s always going to be there, I have a mental illness. Its not who I am as a person, I’m actually really caring and funny… I’m not anxious. But because of my mental illness, it makes me anxious, even scared at times. I cant stay in crowds for too long, and at the age of 18/19 I felt I couldn’t leave the house, I was very scared. The same event occurred again, not just once.
Anxiety grows within us, it starts of as maybe a panic attack, then months later, you may hit depression. Anxiety now, makes me overthink, I overthink the littlest things and turn them into the greatest things in my own head. I’m not crazy, I just don’t like talking in front of others, I didn’t like going places on my own at first. I felt I couldn’t breath. At the time, I was very frightened and to this day, I now have to take 5 minutes to myself at times if I’m at pre drinks. I crave my own space.
For those that are going through any kind of mental illness, look at how old you were when it occurred and how much you are growing as a person, away from your mental illness. I’m now 22 and I join clubs at university, I study when I can but every day I still have moments where anxiety hits me. For instance sitting in a lecture isn’t comfortable for me but reaching out for help is a huge step. Stay strong and if its something new that’s occurring through your life, doctors, mental health groups such as ‘Mind’ or your friends and family are there to support you. Those that who are aged 17-19 – this was the worst time for me growing up. Knowing what career path to take, your hormones are everywhere, you may feel lost etc. Remember who you are deep down and small steps for someone else may be your biggest steps, so take steps at your own pace.
Reading, meditating and Blogging are ways of escapism as well as watching Ellen on YouTube 😉
I hope you all have a lovely day and hopefully I will get back to blogging more often.